My Wife By God’s Decree

Sixteen Assumptions That Change Everything


Written By Michael K. Pasque

    Before time began, God knew the character traits, personalities, and behavioral responses of every man and every woman that would ever live in His creation.  He knew their every response to every question He would pose and to every circumstance in which He could place them.  He knew exactly what would happen in every possible marriage combination of every possible man and woman.  Then, with His foreknowledge of our belief in His Son, Jesus, and within the context and confines of our free will decisions, He chose the perfect wife for each one of us.

    The knowledge that Almighty God chose our wife specifically for each of us has implications that affect every part of our lives.  Truly, this changes everything.  There is no more “perfect” wife for any one of us anywhere in the world, anywhere in time.  All other women were evaluated by God and were found wanting.

    Our interactions with our wife are the very focal point, in each of our lives, of Jesus’ very specific command to us to “love one another” (John 13:34). If we are married, then no other person who fits the Biblical description of “one another” in the passage from the Gospel of John deserves more attention than our wife.  Our relationship with our wife is the very focal point of our relationship with Jesus Christ – if it is not right, even in the smallest of areas, anytime and all the time, then our relationship with Jesus Christ is not right either.

    All of our wife’s traits that drive us up the wall are precisely the traits that made her the perfect wife for us.  Those traits are the keys to the hidden sin that God wants to uncover and remove from our hearts and are the keys to our sanctification.  These are the deep-seated sin issues that only an incredibly intimate relationship with a very special life partner can reveal.

    In the heart of every woman is a divinely placed desire to be married to a man of God.  Deep down in her heart of hearts, she knows there is something more, something awesome, out there; something entirely outside of herself; something entirely outside of her husband.  She wants to share the quest for that something with a man of God.  If we want to keep her interest and keep our marriage thriving, then we must work hard toward the goal of our sanctification—our transformation into the image of Jesus Christ.  His is the face she seeks.  His is the face whose image is emblazoned on her heart.  The more we resemble Him in our thoughts, words and actions, the more we will appeal to her—because it is He she really seeks.

    Our wife must come to know—by our humbled heart, by our words and, most importantly, by our actions—that no one less than the Creator of All, Jesus Christ, is at the center of our life and, therefore, at the center of our love for her.  Every chapter of this book is about exactly this—shifting the foundation of marriages away from us and toward the King of kings, Jesus.

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